Top Reason to Learn Greek/Hebrew

You might think it is so that you can have a deeper connection to/understanding of God's word in the language He chose to reveal it.

You might think it is so that you can look smart carrying around some ancient documents.

You might think it is so that you can listen critically to sermons using the original language as support for their sometimes less-than-accurate points.

You might think it is just because Greek and Hebrew are cool (and, yes, they are very cool).

But the number one reason? The top reason to learn these, or any, ancient languages?

So that your friends can come and ask you before they:

- paint something on their wall

- make a piece of jewelry for a friend

- tattoo something totally ridiculous on their body

Biblical Literature students: saving the world from inaccurate tattoos, one intervention at a time. This is our high calling.

Latin Moment 02

Me: Melissa, can you read our next vocabulary word?

Melissa: Sure. Assen...askend...ascendit?

Me: Yeah! This word means, "he, she or it climbs." Now what are some English cognates we have of this word?

rapidly the kids list off all the cognates they can think of...

Emily: ascend!

Melissa: ascent!

Me: Yes! And some other words you might recognize when you come to them, like...

Austin: Mountain!

pause

Me: Actually, Austin, "cognate" means...

Austin: Birds!

pause

Austin made us laugh pretty hard more than once yesterday. I had no idea what was going through his mind for about half the class, but it was definitely fun to try to get him back on track.

Also, the newest character in our story is named Sextus. I don't think I even need to mention some of the craziness that arose from that introduction. In pictura est alter puer, nomine Sextus. They didn't even try to translate that sentence - there was much too much laughter going on.

With all the rowdiness that sometimes goes on in class, I would still say I have the best group of Latin kids I could have hoped for during my first semester.

Latin Moment 01

I teach a Latin class for some kids grades 3-6 on Thursday afternoons. Today we were going around the table translating a passage in the Ecce Romani book.

Sarah: "Cornelia iam sub arbore sedet et legit." Emily?

Emily: Cornelia...under the tree...sits and reads.

Sarah: Iam?

Emily: Now!

Sarah: Right. "Now Cornelia sits under the tree and reads." Next, "Etiam in pictura est altera puella, nomine Flavia." Hannah?

The translation for this one is, "Also in the picture is another girl named Flavia." All I got from Hannah was a raised eyebrow.

Sarah: Let's go one by one. Etiam...

Hannah: incredulously Flavia?

It seems Flavia is one hilarious name. Any time her name was mentioned for the rest of the lesson all the kids would burst out laughing. If her name went unmentioned for too long, Austin made sure to throw it in a sentence.

My favorite moment:

Sarah: Zach, which question would you like to read?

Zach: Mmmm...the bottom one.

Sarah: What words do you recognize?

Zach: laeta...and.... looks at Emily knowingly

Zach and Emily then said "Flavia" in stereo, in the most sultry tone imaginable.

Well, I think this is going to be a fun semester.

Seminary Words

Okay, I added this fellow to my links list on the right sidebar over there, but I just had to include this particular link today. It made me laugh out loud several times. He writes about how Christians like to overuse their "one seminary word."

My favorite, although it's not a theological word, is "behoove." It's somehow added to everyone's theological lexicon as soon as they return from their first day of seminary. "I think it would behoove us to clean out the refrigerator tonight." There are some words you use that are ineffective, not because they don't mean exactly what you think they do, but because I'm so distracted that you actually just used that word.

My olde worship pastor at church started using this word when we first started studying Greek together. He used it 5 times in 5 minutes, and he didn't even notice. This was before he went to seminary, though - but he was thinking about the move at the time. I think the infection was that strong - even the inclination of seminary started shoving ridiculous words in his head.

Also have you noticed that very educated people often mispronounce words (esp. historical figures, places) just to be distinctive? They aren't ignorant, it's just that they think they've earned the right to tweak our pronunciation a bit. Athanasius. Galilee. You can't fool me, guys - I know Greek and Hebrew.

My personal downfall is outdated slang. But I suppose that's annoying on a different level.

Bingua

gotta love xkcd

Before I could create this blog, the folks at google, in order to confirm that I am not a robot, asked me to recognize a word. This word was bingua. "Bilingual" was robbed of its l's and one of the i's ate the other. Or something.

Anyway, it made me think, "Too bad I'm not bilingual." People are always asking me (well, maybe they just ask me more than I would prefer), "How many languages do you speak/know?" I always say "Just one." I have seriously studied seven. I feel guilty saying that I know seven. I really don't know them...I just know enough to impress people and maybe translate some ancient documents with a lexicon near at hand. Also, are you still "bilingual" if you don't really speak a language, you can just read it? For instance, I've studied some Latin. If I had a fairly comprehensive understanding of Latin, but never spoke it, would I be bilingual? I think it makes me biscriptal. Or something. So I am septascriptal.

I have a friend that speaks Latin fluently. He tries to speak to me because the knowledge makes him lonely, I think. I can follow along, at least.

One time, my professor told me that there are thousands of Akkadian sherds that haven't been translated because it's a boring job. I thought, "Give me 6 months to learn. I will translate them. And it will be fun!" But then I thought, "Does that make me boring, or eccentric, or exotic? Or a snob?" So I decided not to learn it, just in case it was anything but exotic.

I think I just feel like a quirky knick knack that no one knows where to put in their house. Here is a very frequent exchange:

"What did you study in school?"

"Biblical Literature."

"What?"

"The Bible and dead languages."

"Wow. Sounds...smart."

What does that mean? It feels like an insult. I know it is not an insult, but I'm sensitive these days, because I'm a septascript working a McJob at minimum wage.

Well, I decided this summer that I am tired of living outside the box. Rather than get back in it, though, I'm going to expand its edges so that I fit inside. Okay, actually, I just spent so long away from language studies that I started to miss them, and decided to teach them and share the joy. Because it is truly a joy for me, even if you don't understand it.

But maybe you would like to understand? Or maybe you would just like to be a misunderstood multiscript. I'm offering Latin, Koine Greek, and Biblical Hebrew. Hit me up.

This rant brought to you by "bingua."